Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Comic 4-58

Transcript
Eddie: And the Boss just doesn’t care! I have no idea where to even start on figuring that thing out.
Kid: Yeah, but maybe he’s right? We just roll with all the bizarre stuff the Bender can do without understanding it completely.
Eddie: But if I knew how this thing worked, I might be able to build little ones we could carry! We might be able to leave radios for communication and talk to people huge distances away faster than light with a unit you could hold in one hand! We could...
Bender interrupts, handing Eddie a screen.
Kid: What’s that?
Eddie: It’s blueprints to the old Hawking Drive, I think. Why would you...?
Eddie has a sudden realization.
Eddie turns and kisses Bender full on the lips.
Eddie runs off, leaving a stunned Bender behind.
Bender smiles and shrugs at a surprised Kid.
Kid exchanges a confused look with you.

Saturday, January 27, 2018

Comic 4-57

Transcript
Jackman: Hey, Kid, how was it on the planet?
Kid: Oh, yeah, it wasn’t fun, but probably not as bad as it sounded, really.
Jackman: Well, it sure sounded like you had died out there.
Kid: Yeah... well, I didn’t.
Jackman: Good. Don’t.

Thursday, January 25, 2018

Comic 4-56

Transcript
Boss: Eddie, I can see stuff happening light minutes away with no delay or traceability. I don’t see a downside here.
Eddie: The downside is we have no idea how this is working. It’s not receiving any carrier wave or signal that I can detect, it doesn’t seem to have any input at all, but it gives us instantaneous passive scanning for several light months??
Boss: All I’m hearing is “massive tactical advantage.”
Eddie: Try “magic tactical advantage” on for size. It doesn’t bother you that we can’t explain how this works?
Boss looks at the Bender as she walks past.
Boss: Nope. “Magic” stopped bothering me years ago.

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Comic 4-55

Transcript
Kid: That gun is absolutely worthless! I got one shot off. ONE!
Boss: And there’s word floating around about new scanning technology being developed by Boing Corp. Could we get one of those?
President Partisnets: Absolutely, we’ll arrange pickup immediately.
Eddie: So what about the corporations? Are they going to be upset with how things turned out?
President Partisnets: We’re planning on declaring our entrance into private space following a press trial, but as long as the corporations pay us, we’ll work for them. The impression of several high-ranking corporate officials on Terracore is that will be satisfactory. More of their ships will be here soon in order to make an all out attack too expensive for the Galactic Fleet to try. We’ll get you paid before they arrive.
Eddie: Did we just help create a cyborg hive mind?
Boss: We got some sick swag for whatever it was, so I’m not sure I care.

Saturday, January 20, 2018

Comic 4-54

Note: The interested reader may want to know that tunneling scans is a shorthand term for Micro Wormhole Tunnel Scans, which is an active scanning technology that uses tiny wormholes to gather information much faster than the laws of physics would normally allow. Without that technology, the furthest battlehulk from Terracore would have taken a more than a year to realize the planet was being nuked.

Transcript
Guy: Hey, just what do you think you’re doing?
Boss: We were paid to save the population of the planet. So we’re saving them.
Guy: But we already paid you!
Boss: You paid us for information. We gave it to you, and you ignored it. This led to us being paid for action, which we’re doing. I don’t see how those contracts conflict.
Guy: If you don’t stoop, I’m going to blow you out of the sky with an orbital beam.
Boss: You didn’t think this through very well, did you?
Boss: We’ve blown open four of your cleverly shielded little bombers and exposed the radiation signature of their payload to tunneling scans from worlds away. I know of several very protective corporations that have holdings on Terracore. Don’t you think they’ll be interested in why someone appears to be nuking the planet?
Shot of the carrier in space, behind which two battlehulks and another carrier are emerging from wormholes.
Guy: I hate mercenaries.
Boss: Now I can see you’ve got you hands full, so I’ll let you go. But just remember, the sooner you start calling off the attack, the sooner I stop shooting your tanks.

Thursday, January 18, 2018

Comic 4-53

Transcript
Pex: That’s two tanks down, Boss, but we’ve still got 30 to go and they’re dispersing rapidly.
RRRRRUMBLE!
Pex: They’re also shooting back.
Boss: Keith, that was on your side. I’m disappointed they got the chance to shoot at all.

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Comic 4-52

Transcript
Union Pilot 1: I’m not sure how I feel about carrying an actual nuke on this thing.
Union Pilot 2: Oh, relax. We’re heavily shielded against the radiation, and we’re going to be dropping it from miles up.
Union Pilot 1: I guess that’s true. Hey, what’s that ship doing?
KABLAAAAM (union tank explodes)
Union Pilot 1: I’m betting we’re not so heavily shielded now.

Saturday, January 13, 2018

Comic 4-51

Note: The interested reader may want to know that the gun currently being manned by the Kid is only useful for keeping limpet mines off of the back of the ship. The other weapons pods can cover the back of the ship very effectively, assuming what they're shooting at isn't directly attached to the rear hull. Despite being marginally useful on paper, the pod is cramped, has a very limited range of motion, and is actually fairly useless in the vast majority of cases. The perfect post for a kid.

Transcript
Eddie: So we’re attacking a carrier?
Boss: Yep. Pex, get us in the air. The rest of you into your pods!
Kid: Oh, c’mon, Boss, can I man the missiles instead?
Boss: We need that gun manned, kid. Get back there.
Kid: “...and a 27 degree engagement field.” You say that like it’s a good thing!

Thursday, January 11, 2018

Comic 4-50

Transcript
President Partisnets: Please, we will pay you anything from the wealth this planet has to offer. We don’t have a defensive force, we were a public planet! You must help us!
Boss: You had me at “will pay.” I just need to get a few more...
Four people bend into existence behind the Boss.
Boss: ...nevermind, we’re moving to engage the enemy now.
Kid: Wait, what just happened?

Tuesday, January 9, 2018

Comic 4-49

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Transcript
Boss: And they claim to be acting in self defense? Interesting. So how do we know who to trust?
Jackman: Boss, the zombies outside have stopped shelling us. They’re all turning to leave. Some of them are... weeping, maybe?
Keith: Boss, the carrier is scrambling planetary bombers. I’m seeing live nuke signs, so I guess they’re planning to EMP the planet the old way?
Boss: Trust robots, or trust the government. Why can’t these decisions be easier?
Jackman: Boss, the people on the surface just made radio contact. They want to pay us to protect them.
Boss: That’s easier. Jackman, send that signal to me.

Saturday, January 6, 2018

Comic 4-48

Transcript
Kid: Boss, we’ve figured out what’s going on here! The Galactic Military is going to nuke the planet!
Boss: Oh, no, we talked to them and sold them the idea that you could knock out these nanites with an EMP. They’re going to do that instead.
Kid looking at the guy, who obviously hasn’t been privy to this radio conversation.
Kid: Okay, sombody is lying to us.
Pex: Can we go back to shooting everything again?

Thursday, January 4, 2018

Comic 4-47

Transcript
Kid: Hey, anybody on the Eclipse, this is the Kid! Can you hear me?
Boss over radio: Kid, this is the Boss. Where have you guys been?
Kid: Hey, I got the Boss!
Radio voice: Wait, aren’t you dead?
Kid: Ah, I got Jackman too.

Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Comic 4-46

Transcript
Eddie: So how do you define self in this instance? A hive mind of machines networked with individuals?
Guy: It’s... odd. Difficult to define, really. Right now, I, or we, couldn’t tell you who’s even talking, the bots or the body.
Eddie: That’s so unusual. And I see that you haven’t quite figured out the use of pronouns in this situation.
Guy: The mechanics of larger language structures don’t really have a word to describe exactly what...
Kid: Guys, we’re running to save an emerging species here. Maybe the best time to discuss pronouns would be later?
Pex: “Save an emerging species?” I’m running to save myself!